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Open Heart Surgery Podcast

Setting Boundaries

Boundaries...what's the meaning of the word?  In truth, there are many meanings to boundaries.  I am referring specifically to the boundaries we set for ourselves.

Have you ever woken up with a million things to do and by the end of the day, you've only accomplished a small amount of the things on your list?  What happened?  What was more important than completing the things on your list? 

When I have days like these, I realize that I'm allowing myself to be pulled in many different directions and forgetting about the priorities I have set for myself.  I realize that I'm forgetting to set boundaries.

Setting healthy boundaries is essential to my success and happiness.  This translates into a happier and healthier me, which is felt by all of those I come in contact with.  A big part of setting boundaries is learning to say "No."


I used to be uncomfortable saying no.  I would give all of my energy and time away to other people and causes that did not serve me. I ended up depleted and resentful because I was giving so much and had nothing left for myself.

I did this because I used to care so much what people thought about me.  I would give and give because I was afraid they would lose respect for me.  As I grew up, I realized that by giving in, I was actually losing respect from the very people I was trying to please.  Ironically, I earned more respect as I learned to say no and take care of myself first. 

Everything is about respect.  Respect others by respecting yourself first.  If I'm not saying no when I want or need to, what I'm really saying is that I don't respect myself and my time enough to do what I need to do.  And that you and your time is more important than mine.

If you don't respect yourself, then why would anyone else?

It took me a long time to realize this.  But when I did, I was like a 2 year old discovering "No," for the first time.  NO NO NO NO LOL. Just kidding, but seriously. 

But getting back to the message of today's post, setting boundaries is a key to my happiness, success, and well-being.  And a big part of setting healthy boundaries is learning to say no to people and things that are not for your greatest good.

So I invite you to ask yourself what boundaries you have in place?  Do you have trouble saying no and give in? Why do you do that? Is it serving your greatest good?

As always, I appreciate you reading my post.  Please like, share, and subscribe to my newsletter.  I'm always here for comments, questions, and coaching.  Have a great day!